You know those scenes in movies when one object or person is in focus but everything/everyone else is blurry? Well, I think that is how I have been living my life – I focus my attention on one person or project at a time but the different pieces of my life never seemed to fit together as one clear and cohesive image. Recently, I’ve been spending time considering where and how my yoga world, my education world, my social world, my emotional world, and my personal/love world intersect. And interestingly enough, once I discovered how to dovetail my professional passions, the other parts of my life have begun to come into focus.
By no means am I so naive to think that now with this new sense of clarity, that life won’t get blurry at times. It will. But part of being a grown up learning how to reflect on her successes and failures, I am developing awareness around when and where I need to ‘zoom in’ on a person or project without doing so at the expense of all the other people and projects I love. And not at my own expense either – I mean, what good can I be if I lose sight of myself?
I can already tell that there will be some growing pains associated with my newly acquired sense of direction. For me, expressing gratitude is easy but asking for help borders on painful. Bending over backwards for others seems natural but standing up for myself is a doozie! Holding myself accountable is a breeze but holding others accountable and having difficult conversations makes my armpits sweaty.
When I step back and focus on the big picture – in full color and high definition – I know that there will be times when turning this vision into a reality means being completely out of my comfort zone. It’s a challenge I’m ready to step into. Chances are, I’ll meet disappointment and encounter struggles along the way. I don’t want to get too caught up in the minutia of things but I do want to celebrate the small, everyday victories.