For approximately the last six months I’ve been planning a trip to India. I purchased flights, train tickets, charted (and re-charted) my travels, and told just about everyone I know about my adventure. Currently (not by the time this is published) I am sitting in the international terminal at IAH trying to decide if I am more excited or nervous. It is likely that I am equally parts both. Not to mention how grateful I am to even have the opportunity for this type of journey. Without the love, encouragement, and support of my friends and especially my family this could never have come to fruition.
Anyway, I am also thinking about a conversation I had with a friend recently. We were, of course, talking about my trip and for the first time I verbalized that I am going into this with no expectations. Now I’m not saying that this trip won’t have a huge impact on my life, but that I have no idea what aspects of my life will shift during the trip, immediately following the trip, and in the long term. I want to be a sponge and soak up every drop of education this opportunity can provide without carrying any preconceived notions about what I should be learning. Knowing myself as I do, I am confident there will be moments when I ask myself, “What did I do?”, times when I want to curl up into a ball and cry, and many, many times when I feel overwhelmed by the sights, smells, colors, and experiences.
All of this to say, I am as ready as possible. As my bff told me, “make sure you move the camera away from your face and look around you.” He knows I want to document every second of this trip but I can’t sacrifice experiencing the journey just because I want to try and hang on to it even after I return.
I have probably overplanned for this trip and I expect my well constructed plans to go awry at some point but I this type-A gal is going to have to learn to roll with it. Maybe that will be the big lesson – who knows! What I do know is that in the next 8 weeks I will have plenty of time for some self-exploration. I will soon find out if I enjoy spending time with myself.
The more I consider the potential gifts of this trip the more I realize they are infinite. I am truly blessed. What I aim to do is embrace this voyage to India and into my own heart with love – even if things seem to be falling apart.